Sunday, December 13, 2009

A Killer Time

Picture via Scud: The Disposable Assassin

My first week here has been a reintroduction into why I left in the first place. I left because I didn't fit in... well, more than that I didn't feel at home in the one place I should. Here, with my family, I feel so out of place. It's as if I'm merely an observer of what I was expected to have at my age.

So, I was at my sister Lorna's house for most of the past week. Nothing really interesting happened until last Friday when my family made me go play bingo with them at the tribal community center. The only one of us that won something was my sister Tippy, who won a PS2. I spent that night sitting next to my father writing down all of the calls so that he could dab his bingo card and not win anything. I went to my sister Lorna's from there. On Saturday, we all went back to my parents house and cut down some brush and had a fire in the back yard. I didn't help with the cutting because my leg was hurting pretty bad. After supper and hanging out, I went with my sister Lorna, her husband (Gabe) and their kids back to their home. On Sunday, Lorna made me go to church with them, which was awesome.... The only seats left were in the front. I spent the duration of the service both reading The Starship Titanic and taking notes on the discrepancies in the pastors sermon. This hardly kept me entertained.

The rest of the week was fairly uneventful. I graded some tests from my sister Lorna's science classes. I did get into a rather long winded argument with her early in the week though. She has the opinion that because she has a degree, she is more intelligent than me, or in fact more intelligent than anyone without a degree. This lasted several hours until she, at the prompting of her husband, who also doesn't have a degree, stomped off into her bedroom to pout.

This past Friday, I went to the Christmas concert at my old high school. It was kind of awesome. I got to talk to my old music director, who is one of the most important people in my life. He helped to shape the person I am today. The concert was great though, I seem to remember my class being better musicians. Most of the other people that had been to past concerts agreed. I think that my class had more love in our music. Anyway, at the end of the concert, as is the tradition, all Alumni from the music department were called up to the stage to close the concert singing Silent Night. I actually started crying. As much as I complain about being here, I will never forget the joy I found in being on stage playing music with Mr. Weinberger directing.

I don't think I will ever actually feel at home here. I do know that no matter what I get myself into I will always have a place to go where though, I'm not understood, I am loved.

Until next time,

Friday, December 4, 2009

Old Habits Die Hard

Picture via Fluke by Christopher Moore

Alright so here's the thing. My Dad's been getting sick off and on for the past year now. He's been getting after me to come back home (I've been living in Arizona for the past two years)so, when my lease went up at the end of November, I did. Well, after after spending two weeks in Texas.... Getting here was an adventure all it's own. My flight went from DFW to PHX and from there to SFO. I was to take the train from San Francisco to Fresno where my parents would pick me up and take me home. Now, my flight from DFW was fine... well except for the two dumbasses I sat next to on the plane. (and the fact that is was snowing and the jerk working at the gate) I actually had to explain comic books to the guys on the plane.... We arrive in Phoenix to board the plane on time. My hope for the day renewed, we begin our way down the tarmac... only to discover that traffic is backed up in San Francisco... our plane pulls back into the gate and we find out that our flight will not be leaving for another hour. At that point it was already a half hour late. So, we finally leave from Phoenix and arrive in San Francisco, from there I grabbed a cab to the Amtrak and took the train to Fresburg. When the train got in, I didn't know where to go to get my checked luggage. So, I tried getting into the train station but, it was closed. So, I got to run around until I found a lady driving a cart around with my luggage on it... about to lock it up. I got it from her and everything was fine. We stopped for supper and my parents took me home.

Now that I have that out of the way, I'll start posting my rantings about my family and whatever anecdotes I find entertaining starting tomorrow.


Saturday, January 31, 2009

It's still January

I've been going back and forth with weather I'm staying in California or going back to Arizona. I'm still really confused. I suppose it doesn't really matter where I go job wise because it's balls to find a job in either place. I've been here for almost three months and I can't find a job and I still have no job to go to in AZ. I have decided that I'm focusing all my efforts to get into Berkeley next fall. School is the most important thing for me right now, at least I have that figured out. Staying here in Cali since it's an easier transfer to Berkeley, I just need a job to secure my place here and to find someone to take over my lease back in Arizona.

I have a flight booked for the 7th of February back to Arizona. The only thing is that I'm not sure if it's a flight back to stay or a flight back to get my things and come back to California. There really isn't anything keeping me in either place.

I know it's a little late for New Year's resolutions but, here's the first one I've ever made: I'm giving up men. For the whole year at the least but, most likely until I'm at Berkeley next fall.

So, here's to a new year, again. And here's to hoping that this is the year I figure my life out.